- sleep is a distant memory
- dressing a toddler is like dressing an octupus
- food crumbs all over the back seat will be acceptable
- during meal times you will need a dropsheet to cover any surface within spoon flinging range
- any small opening is fair game for any toddler to shove small items into
- a walk around the block takes at least an extra hour and is accompanied by eye spy games
- your conversations turn into discussions about toilet training, colour and frequency of bowel movements, sleeping rituals, eating habits (or lack thereof) and which of the Wiggles is you favourite
- you will know all the words to all the songs of High School Musical
- with the amount of money that you spend on groceries you might as well have your wage paid directly to the supermarket
- lazy Saturday sleeps are replaced with early morning sport matches
- your clean top or pants that you put on that morning will only last about 1 minute in that state
- you'll know all the names to all the Thomas the Tank Engine trains
- your child will come home from kindy with new phrases such as "what the f*?!", try not to overreact
- get use to the sight of blood
- buy shares in a band-aid company
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Things they don't tell you at pre-natal class....
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5 comments:
I wasn't worried about the toddler stuff that they didn't tell me. I thought I had heard all the variations of labour from the aunts but they forgot to mention vomiting on the dotor during contractions. Did you cover the one where you have gastro and then your child/children/husband vomits on the floor and you have to somehow manage their drama all the while keeping a lid on your's.
Sorry about the vomit theme.
kiss kiss
I love this. Makes me feel part of a big group of women who KNOW HOW I FEEL. Thanks for relating this.
AND.... when he cannot stand the smell of toddlers poop and has a hard time keeping his cookies down while changing bottoms, and it is just easier to do it yourself
..."this too will pass and you will wonder how!".......love A/di
HA! I love it! All so true!
when the kids were little caitlin informed me that connor had
"said the f-word!". they were still young enough, and sheltered enough, that i felt pretty safe in asking her what exactly he had said..."he called me a fart-knocker!!!"
i have no idea - don't ask!
wkiwjmph
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